Jesus-loves-me<3

2010-11-18T22:30:00.003+08:00

Just like other girls.... i yearn for a love life that i always wanted....

All i want was that little company from you,
that smile that brings me through my days...

sometimes i wonder.... if all that i have done were redundant.... i hope not.

but why are you giving me that feeling? a feeling that i have never wanted to feel.

feeling of benefit of doubt.

All i need was that mutual respect. That trust.

That very trust u entrusted me when you first met me...

That very look from your eyes that's say Von, i can trust you...

why things have turn out this way??

what more can i do?

Praying hard, wishing hard that you can give me a real tight hug ..

giving me that very assurance that i yearning for now with that trust.

i Hope its not only one sided clap.

2010-08-06T16:06:00.001+08:00

My life= Black and white.... Put some colours in my life please~~

SISI is goin Taiwan for a singing competition!!!
ALL THE BEST SWEETIE!!!!

2010-08-03T02:14:00.003+08:00

ROTTING ROTTING ROTTING ROTTING ROTTING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
MY BLOG IS INDEED ROTTING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I WILL BE BACK TO BLOG SOON!!!!!!

2010-06-01T17:04:00.002+08:00

I GOT A BUMP ON MY FOREHEAD TODAY!! htw!!! cox i hit the corner of the wooden table...=.= it hurts. huu huu~

Bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored
bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored
bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored

BOREDOM~~~~~~~ hits me real big time~!

Alrights, will do my reflections... here goes.

Seriously, i don't know why my mind, my brain is kinda stuck. not moving. but heavy, tight, stress, pressured.

why do i always want to carry the problems myself and put it upon my shoulders?

That's a habit. A real bad habit.

it seems like a new phrase of my life is coming and at the same time it seems like I am back to where I am.
I don't know where my future lies.
I just want to follow my heart for now.

Many comments heard.
Which ever step that I will be taking....
Hope that i will not regret. * fingers crossed*

People are saying,
I 'm 22 this year. How come no bf?
a common Q i should say.. that usually clots up my veins.(hahha)
I have no answer.
" Quickly get a bf, if not u will end up with nothing.... and so on..."

I can only say "LOVE is a craziest thing"
that i can't do without. so do u who's reading it right now..don't you?

Being loved by someone, is way so much better than u loving someone.
it's tiring, it's like a chore to love ppl... that's how it works.

OKok.... enough of all this... well, i guess my friends love me for who i am... isn't it ppl? heh :))

2010-05-18T17:17:00.004+08:00

Don't assume that you know me until you really know me well enough. I am not what you think I am.

So many things gave been happening recently... guess its just within 2 weeks.

What more can I say?... trying my very best to help my every friend that needs help. Being there for them... Doing my part as a friend cox i know how it feels to be Friend-less.

That feeling sucks. I have been betrayed by my closest friend before.

Forgive? Forget? after all that she has done to me?

Yea. i did thought of that. being in the state of unforgiveness, is really something similar to playing the heart and mind game. But one thing for sure about it is, it will definitely weigh you down real hard. Slam you down real hard... Feeling the "Best" of the Pain you will ever get. Never wanted that feeling to surface...

Thinking back to my past, thinking back to the things that I have been through....

it could be really a blessing in disguise. I have always believe that circumstances that I've been through, it will rise me up. Making me a stronger person.

A friend of mine told me that I don't dare to face up to my problems...

Is that true? No.

Maybe at that point of time, when problem arise... That very problem is standing in front of me... and yet I do not have a solution... i will leave it and not touch that problem. Until, I know what to do, I will solve it.

Is just a matter of Sooner or later thing. I will still face it.

Selina has been trying to brainwash my mind again... this time round is

"what it means to be 大方"....

everyone has a different definition of that... and it takes time to learn that. It's never easy.

Within just 2 weeks, 2 people scolded me for NO reason.

It Hurt alot when someone scolded me for NO reason and I didn't do anything wrong.

Given my character, those who know me... i will scold that person back but I didn't this time round. There are reason behind it and its a super long story so i don't wanna mention it...

Well, its Unfair. Nothing is fair in this world. No one will pity you in whatever situation your at.

People grow, people change, meeting different people now and then... I will grow mentally and emotionally i hope.

Will blog again soon.

2010-04-13T16:04:00.002+08:00

Putting my heart together...
I didn't realise that I was gradually growing up till some one told me.
So I no longer find it important to fight.

No one is to be blame, no point repeating
I rather learn to cherish and treasure.

I found you, my dearest friends.
-Selina: you taught me how to be strong. Looking at things in another angle.

-Denise: Always there for me when i needed you. Thanks BLing!

-Ice: All that you went through, you shared with me... I realise there is so much more for me to learn and accept. Thanks BABE! Laughter is the best medicine.

-Terence: You brain washed me, telling me to grow up. i know its time. Thanks Gong Gong!

-Darren Hong: Never fails to laugh at me but somehow the way u say, makes me wanna laugh at myself too... Appreciate it loads!

-Jeffrey: Fruit!! Fruit!!( you know what it means la huh.. haha) Thanks for taking care of me that night. heh.

Once again, THANKS ALL for telling me to be strong. MUACKS!!! <3

Now that it's all said and done,
I can't believe you were the one
to build me up and tear me down,
Like an old abandoned house.
What you said when you send me that sms
Just left me cold and out of breath.
I fell too far, was in way too deep.
Guess I did let you get the BEST of me.

And now I'm picking up the pieces.
Putting my heart back together.

2010-04-05T18:54:00.002+08:00

Alright again Bling commented that my blog is rotting... hahaa so here i m again... seems like i have been saying this sentence most of my blog post. ha...

Yvonne, Yvonne, Yvonne....

A simple girl that just wanna lead her life normally n peacefully but it seems to be the opposite.

Just like a HUGE roller coaster... Up's & Down's doesn't seem to stop.

The way You see the world changes after you start to become who you are. Seeking stops. Needing stops. You start to simply, Be.

A new Veil is lifted and you begin to see clearly why things didn't work the way you wanted...because it would have prevented you living your best life.

When you go toward and become the things you Love & admire you begin to see the oneness of all that is. No one is below you, no one is above you, everyone is one with the flow of Life.

When you get to this place, all the chaos and struggles in your Life will make sense and you will be able to manifest your Heart's desire without delay.

Sometimes it's better to leave them broken than to hurt myself for putting it back together.

Sunflower does make me happier:)

2010-02-06T01:20:00.003+08:00

It has been a very very long time since i ever blogged... my lappy is down & repairing in progress.. so bear with me yea...

So many things are going through my mind now...
emotions are like roller coaster....so many many down points...

Things that i didn't know... things that are hidden from me..
I know everything now...

USELESS me, keep tearing, crying.... USELESS!
I thought that i would leave that hurt untouched but in the end i didn't.

U say you hate me... if it helps you, go ahead... i don't mind getting hated.
The real you is so sad...your heart is aching so badly...
Yet, i can't do anything.

I can't bring myself to hate you... I can't.

5 Feb 2010.
All that you told me... I will never forget...
The last hug...
The last walk...
The last time you stroke my head...
The last time you wipe off my tears...
The last longest chat...
The last taxi journey tgt...
The last time i hear from you what you like about me...
The last time i hear from you that i m perfect in your eyes...
The last time i hear you humming a song...
The last time i hear you say "你要坚强"
The last time i see your back...

When everyone gives up on you... you know i won't.
Forever kept in my heart..

我愿为你选择回到孤单...
来换取你的笑容...
我知道是直得的...
骂我笨吧...

ha...

2009-11-24T01:17:00.002+08:00

My dearest BABY ENTHIA new hideout! she so cute!!! Love her LOTS!!

2009-11-24T01:06:00.002+08:00

Photos photos photos... overdue ones! haha!

I love it! Bling and I...Ain't we lovely?

that guy i took photo with... i like him! hahhaa!!!

More photos coming up!!!!! stay tune peeps!

Christmas is coming!!! busy busy christmas...

2009-11-18T01:11:00.003+08:00

"It's always the memories that hurt the most when everything ends.the happier the memory, the more painful.

They flood your mind like ocean waves.waves that you cant resist, and can only be engulfed by them.

It hurts even more, when you come across the places you've been to together.or see that small little ornament on our dressing table that was gift to you for that occasion.'remember that time?' you whisper to yourself.

oh yes. i still remember your eyes. your smile.that hug that came along with the little lovely present.and that kiss.and then, without caution, tears start to flow.'i miss you..' you say, 'i miss you so much..'when all along, in the day, you still smiled happily around everyone.you broke down...

what will you do, if you meet each other a year or two later, on the streets?pretend you never knew the person and walk off, or go up and say hi?would a casual chat rake up the painful memories again?

that, is love.sweet, but painful at the same time.that, is love.you yearn for it, but is afraid of it at the same time.."

Got this from my friends bloggy...

it really reflects how I'm feeling right this very moment.

woke up form the sweetest dream and yet it can be the most fearful nightmare...

Sweetness mixture of bitterness.

Heart is still aching badly.Finally, i really broke down with so much tears in my eyes...

or i should say,, my heart is really bleeding badly.

I shouted "HELP!" in that corner of the dark room in my heart...

Is it a relieve that i m finally shouting for help in my heart?

not shutting that very door that hard anymore? or it is still very shut that people cant even enter?

No confidence.

Lack of trust for people.

Heart sunk.

Ran out of tears.

When you told me you loved me

did you know it will take me the rest of my life?

To get over the feeling of knowing

A dream didn't turn out right

When you let me believe that you weren't complete

without me by your side

How could i know

That you would go

That you would run

Baby, i thought you were the one.

why can't I just leave it all,everything behind.

Time.

alrights, next year seems to be a Busy bee year for me... hope my trip comes faster... i just want to leave it all behind...really. the fact that i was blind that make me weak..

2009-11-10T16:21:00.002+08:00

My 2nd CLOSET! this time round is kinda plain n wild... heh

Ok i know i look kinda "CUI" but i will post more prettypretty photos for sure! haaha!
I know you guys still love me though i look cui.... =P hahah!

This is the design that Dearie did for me. hehe! Is nice isn't it?

those interested...ask me for the shop number! =)

2009-11-10T00:11:00.003+08:00

Thinking back about my life... those Ups and Downs...

Still it never feels good to think about it all over again. IF i have a choice and able to turn back the clock.. i will not walk that very path.NO MORE.

Things are just like a broken vase, that no matter how you mend it..
the cracks will still be there. either big or small crack.
it still hurts, seriously.

WHY
WHY
WHY

still thinking why do i have to go through those shit...
feeling stagnant once more.

GET BACK THE CONFIDENCE VON!

stop being a BAKA BAKA BAKA!

Anyways.. went to Dearie shop last Sunday. did my manicure! woohoo!! love it!. feels so LOUD!

Thanks DEARIE!

哭过就好了
伤都会好的
痛都会走的
记忆有限所以它会淘汰坏的
还是谢谢你让我长大了

2009-11-01T01:08:00.003+08:00

OUR very first neo print that we took! this is one of my FAV!

I am one of the 女王! haha!

Our earrings!

Really had loads of fun on friday night! although it was a cold and cosy night... I had so much fun! A pre-halloween party! REBEL> ZIRCRA>LUNAR

so much things happened on that night... so fun and crazy!!

Alex came over for a short while and took 2 photos with us. Thanks for making the trip down from Boat Quay... although very near.. hah! appreciated!

INDEED! IT WAS A REALLY CRAZY NIGHT!

2009-10-30T00:54:00.003+08:00

Photos photos photos time!

I LOVE HER!!

Had a great time with Bling today! super funny cum fun!

Finally! my lg phone, that dead phone changes its memory card.. I thought my phone spoilt but in the end is only the memory card that is spoilt hurhuR!! can load more songs! hah! GREAT!

Hmmmm what should i wear???? Closet or dress?

2009-10-22T15:00:00.003+08:00

Realised that i m not strong at all.

maybe i should just say i am weak.

My heart is still bleeding... stagnant.

DAM IT!
Stressed up by so so so many things.

Dance floor is the place that you can really see my smiles.

Enjoyed dancing though. ;)

Someone Embrace me tight.. real tight

& let me have a Big heart to heart cry..

which i have not been doing it for very long.

Let me run away for once... can I?

我努力要自己避開

你給我的傷心地帶

到現在還是一個人

吞噬著自己的能耐

到最後我可以不愛了

你別卻說捨不得.

2009-10-16T01:35:00.002+08:00

Let the photos do the talking... ;)

I just simply LOVE my top!!! :):):)!!!

whenever the Bling Bling gp comes together.... we never leaves out fun, fun & FUN!!! Thanks for being there for me=)

not expecting anything anymore.

JUST DANCE!!! hahh

2009-10-11T20:35:00.003+08:00

What more can I say?
What more can I expect?
Nothing.

That very msg...really hurt me deeply.
Can you see that this fragile heart is still hurting badly?

I love the stud alot. treasure it alright?
Happiness...

2009-10-03T12:57:00.001+08:00

Is it fading bit by bit? Is it too late to salvage everything?

2009-09-30T17:03:00.003+08:00

Not gonna mention anything anymore...
Hurt is not getting me anywhere... one sided thing.
i will just leave it untouched.
maybe thats the best solution for now...

2009-09-30T00:32:00.003+08:00

my heart is so heavy now.. with tears in my eyes..
how much do i weigh in your heart?
is it just a tiny bit? or not at all?
I've kept a tiny bit of hope in my heart...
That i don't dare to hope for even more
although i said i will not waver or even change in my decision in my previous post.
but That tiny bit gives me strength.
but now, somehow is it been destroyed...?
Now i have cried...so painful.. all the pain, all cried out at one go. HURTS.
you never want to fight with the others for me. Or maybe I'm not worth it? ha
you always wanted the best for me but you never spare a thought for my feelings.
you never say things out but keep in your heart.

i should have known that you already made up your mind when you say you don't trust me.
just deluding myself over and over again...hoping there will be another tiny hope.
Guess there will not be a day that you say you trust me. i accept it.

A false alarm right from the start? or maybe you will say you don't know who I am...
Yes, i also don't say it out what I am feeling. i don't want you to feel the same as i am.
Let me be the one feeling all the shit stuff.

why do i still care about you so much when you keep wanting to push me to other people?

I will take your advice as my consideration.

YVONNE, YOUR STUPID.

am i?

2009-09-28T00:12:00.004+08:00

Yup yup, finally met up with my dear friend Kat to celebrate her belated 21st birthday..=)

hope she had fun on that day..hurhur...

Kat,

as you entered into 21st...

life is not going to be easy anymore...

more n more things are coming your way.

some may push you down hard, some will make you very happy...

n sometimes is hard to make decisions...

but but I'm still here.

Just like how you have been there for me...

I will be there.

i cross my heart...

PROMISE!
=)

Thanks so much for listening to me...sorry for at times i push you away when you tried to care for me as a friend. Anyways..wish you Happy as days are coming you way=)

Love ya!

PS: Ming, you really look like charcoal now lei!! haa

2009-09-25T16:13:00.002+08:00

This is what i had for lunch today! KOI bb tea and crab meat fried rice cooked by Michelle! i mean REAL crab meat!! yum!! Want some?

It has been quite some time I didn't get scratched by bunny but it happened yesterday...luckily is not that obvious now heehee...is kinda random i type this haha!

For the next thing your going to read...maybe you will need a plastic bag just in case you vomit...

It might help haha!

READY?

TADA!!! PALE PALE PALE ME!!!

OKAYS! don't say that I always post my nice nice photos of myself...this is me without make up!

PS:have you vomited? haah!!! Selina bling bling says...i look like a kid without makeup... Gosh i have deep dark panda eyes!!!

Enough of my pale face...the photo above is taken quite some time ago...hehe..nice? *Cheeky smile*hurhur...

What's meant to be will be...

no matter how hard you try... facts will always be facts.

Love is not appreciated...

What is love anyway?

Guess is for real that i have to let go.

Flashing back memories,

Flipping through my memory box,

Time just seems to stop at that moment..

Sweetness, hurts, mixed Feelings...

Feeling so stagnant...

Forever is not that forever anymore.

Hope I don't waver again...

How come i still hope that you will hug me real tight?

2009-09-19T23:02:00.002+08:00

I lOVE this pic!!! DO U? hahah!
my heels is a killer! love it love it love it!!!!!!!!

Bling Bling's! We are always in the Center of Attraction!

Derrick & the Bling Bling's! SO xin fu!! hahah!

2009-09-15T15:13:00.006+08:00

SHall blog something up to my bloggy today...some overdue photos that i have yet to post in blog hehe so here it is...

Things have been pulling me down that i do not have the feeling to even want to talk about it over again... RISE UP VON! STAND UP N MOVE ON!! yea i will. =)

Forever is not a timeline but a feeling.
Forever can be that very second.
Forever can be that very minute.

I guess Forever can never really be forever..

This heavy and burdened heart who understands? IS easier to advise people and console them but is never easy to advise or even console myself. Never. Just takes time...

Forgive is another "BIG" word in my life now. can i even forgive?
"Blame"? there is no reason or even a choice for me to blame. it all started with me? I dunno..

ha..ok enough of the emo-ness...

Thanks to the BLING BLING GANG! for being there for me whenever i needed a listening ear...Selina, Denise, Michelle... and of cox Kat and Ming...who always wanted to help me and care for me... really appreciated all of you...although i do not say but i really am happy that i do have you guys as friends.

Guess Yvonne have really change? to be a cold hearted and attitude person? hais... I do not want this to be happening too...Circumstances really do change a person heart and how you face it is another thing.

enough of talking... photos photos time!

ME!

the BLING BLING GANG!!!

Boom boom shake shake!

Ain't we lovely?

I love her!! my long time friend!

Kat and me!!

the 4 solo's!haha!

Shall update more soon.

2009-08-06T22:09:00.003+08:00

(MY GAN MA & ME!! somehow we look alike hahha!!)

Been so so busy lately due to my work... GOSH! NO time for myself..Especially when moving all the things to Lavender. Whew! at least is over! haha! Although there is no TV, I didn't bring my laptop to work hence can't get online or check my things... I get to chat with my bosses more..Time still pass very fast. I get to see dogs though! they are so so CUTE!!! LOVE THEM!!!

Lavender has alot of weird people... More than SN! haha.. i miss people at SN..miss my gan ma. :(:(

2009-07-23T17:41:00.002+08:00

Celebrated Jo's birthday on tues..an advance one.. as pretty fun...but it was a tiring day for me..

Rushing here and there is no joke. And I m still late to meet them hahah! sry guys....

guess i am starting to hook in singing although my voice not really nice hahha! but i still prefer english songs cox my chinese not really good though.. I still love dancing... :)

anyways, The movie "fighting" is out i think ! i am so gonna watch it.. wanna watch "the house on the left, orphan & the "final destination" too.

later programme of today, m gonna watch harry potter..heard from alot of people that this time round harry potter show was quite a disappointment... hmmm we shall see haha!

2009-07-20T13:33:00.004+08:00

Thanks to all for came for my birthday bash...Especially, Gina who stayed with me on the Sunday night if not... never mind... alot of presents, alot of friends came... Tension is so HUGE and definitely I am not happy. Throughout the whole thing.

So many things in my mind that I could hardly breathe. So hard to digest in my mind. Everything is chocking in my mind. like is gonna Explode anytime...

Close friends are saying...Chill von chill...you can do it...but sometimes things seem not what they are. Is harder to slove but easier to run away... & how i wished I could run away but I can't... That's just not me... That's why I am so vexed now...HOpefully I wont get into depression ha!

I just want to go to Australia thats all...

What more can I say? Just feel like going MIA... oKOK!! I know! Running away feeling is here again...hais....

Sometimes, I think I am a failure...

towards R/S, Family, friends....

I feel Like what my friends say about me is right...DUMBO is my 2nd name. FLIRT is my 3rd name. HA! LAUGH OUT LOUD! i seriously don't know what to say...

So to you who are reading my bloggy...am I a failure to you?

Maybe just leave me alone for the time being?

Someone just use a knife and stab me at the back...

my Sunflower died.... Someone please make me smile from deep within...not the outside of me only....Please?

2009-07-07T21:51:00.004+08:00

Today marks the day 4 of age of the babies bunnies... time passes really fast & is indeed a good thing to see them grow bit by bit day by day. :):)

Don't know why i have been having headaches recently...is it cox too stress from my birthday bash? i also have no idea... just hope that my headache will go away tomorrow...

Alright, tomorrow my off day but m still going back to the shop to feed the babies.. then off to meet my friend Nicole to watch ice age 3... hope tomorrow will be a Happy and fun day before my birthday.... got to go...blog again soon.. :):)

PS: THANK YOU YONG YONG FOR THE SWEET GIFT...THE BOTTLE OF STARS.. APPRECIATED IT LOT'S :)

2009-07-06T01:13:00.002+08:00

This tiny one above was born on the first week(sat) of July.. not one but 4!!! is a baby rabbit..can see that it is even smaller than the size of my palm??!

It wasn't birthed by any bunnies that i sold in the shop but is the 2 bunnies that was abandoned by their owner.

POP!!! comes out 4 & the mummy rabbit do not know how to take care of them & feed them!

The babies were all so cold when i first carried them... n so weak...cox the mummy don't know how to feed...=.=

OK never mind...i quickly called my lady boss n ask her what to do as this is my first time encountering this issue... GOSH... m so afraid that the babies will die...

my lady boss said that the babies must drink the milk from the mummy... if not they die...

but but but....

i observed for so long, the mummy don't know how to feed. seriously, I'm freaking out...

Can't let 4 tiny lives just die like that...

Thank God! that I was reminded of the method that i usually used for grooming rabbits.

then then i gave it a shot.. IT WORKS!!! the babies are drinking! A BIG WHEW to me mans!!!...

Am really Glad that they are growing well... they will be 3 days old today(Monday)

Looking forward to the time that they open their eyes... =)

2009-07-06T01:09:00.002+08:00

PEEPS! i finally got the craves to buy heels!!!

i bought a flats n a heels on Saturday after work at PS.. was in the shop for almost an hour!!

I really like the 2 above is cause of their design...

Really happy happy!! claps claps!!

2009-07-03T13:29:00.005+08:00

Tuesday night or i should say wed morning at 1 am till 6am ++ was a chaotic night...

Shall not repeat it in my bloggy... very very very tired after that...

met up with kat n ming on wed also... but around late afternoon...

Wa pretty fun day but TIRED DAY!!! dam tired... went to the pastries shop, thought i can order my pastries...in the end cannot order due to....too many people order... totally sian! =.=

nothing much to update... shall stop here... Anyways counting down to my Birthday bash!

The biggest happening thing coming up!!!

Because of you, i finally know the meaning of being lonely...

2009-06-30T13:12:00.002+08:00

The evidence in above!!! & YES YES YES!!! i watched the movie Drag me to hell!!! Nonono...I should say I SURVIVED!!! Oh my goodness! Before the show, heart pumping fast...

During the advertisement...even faster!! start of the show i was trembling and feeling cold!! Some of you know that i don't watch scary movies at all...hah... Kelvin la! keep telling me the show is so nice...lalala... so i went o watch with him...& he seen it before.. He keep looking at me and telling me that I must be "Ai zai" (steady) and he is laughing at me la...=.=... I really got scared during the show...but quite nice la...ha! Holding my bag close to my heart real tight, use my hands to cover my eyes or ears...luckily, I didn't scratch his arm hahha!! He told me that he wore a long sleeve blouse just in case...=.=

Show ended... walked out of the theatre...I AM STILL TREMBLING!! all the way till we walked to habourfront Mac to have a hot drink to calm myself down...is really oh my goodness... and he is still laughing at me..=.=....( next time just drag me to theatre...LOL)

It ended around 11.45pm...we chat till 1.30am +.... He keep disturbing me that the old lady in the show will come and find me... & keep reminding me about the show especially disgusting parts.. but quite funny the way we chat...

Had fun although trembling night...

Am I a happy go lucky person?

PS: Thanks for giving me the promise that You'll be there for me whenever I am upset.

Appreciate it alot... :):):)!!!!

2009-06-27T12:25:00.004+08:00

Went to Boat Quay with ming ming Yesterday night then met up Kelvin. It was the most fun night at Eski bar with ming Yesterday. kel went to beer belly(i think) haha! Gosh la he is really my silly kelkel...take photo no expression=.=.... But HAPPY to see him though!

Ming and I drank alot...the most out of the many times we went haha! and cost about 120 Bucks! oh gosh! I still like the drink above. (way to the top). ICe cream with voka taste super nice!!!!!!!!!!!! love that the most!

The 2 Pics above is my very first advance birthday gift by my fav auntie(May aka Jolin).

I love it alot!!! Usually i will wear those thinner kind of bracelet but this is the first time i love a thicker kind of bracelet. Really Love it alot! Thank Jolin hahaha!!

The Necklace above is give by my own customer. Isn't it beautiful? a key with a lock..=)

Thanks yea!!

Trying to act scary but is NOT !!!!hhaa!!

NO Business at the pet shop = Nothing to do

Pictures time!! all above haha! okok not really cam whore...quite lazy though hah!!

PS: I know YONG YONG(Yong Hwen) is viewing my blog!:):):):)

In another weeks ++!!!!! Please let me transfer to Lavender branch! haha!

2009-06-24T15:19:00.004+08:00

Having fun with my new cap!!.( Bought a new leopard sports jacket too! Shall take photo with it the next time! Liz!! U passed me the virus of loving leopard spots! but m against people wearing the real one- Too bad la I am animal lover haha!)

Today is Wednesday and I am working cox i move forward my off to Yesterday..

Alright shall start from Monday... Woke up early on Monday morning totally strains me off. No choice time for my appointment. Everything was good. Those need to be reduced is already reduced and will be taken off early next year.ha...HAPPY!

Tuesdays- went for my eye appointment...thought will take a long time before is my turn... but but to my surprise is pretty fast. faster than the previous time i went. Great! I have more time for Enthia. It has been ages since i seen her! After that went to J8 to meet Michelle and Enthia.

Gosh!!she has grown so much & she is wearing the dress i bought for her! SO cute!!haha!

Carried her for awhile then then then....CRY!!!!!!!!!! OMG she can really tear down the shopping mall! Super Loud when she scream at her top of her voice... but she is so adorable when she smile...

After awhile, went to meet Nicole at woodlands & had dinner there. & we went to Orchard to walk, shop for awhile...HOME.

I was like a dumb person waiting and waiting... I feel so empty till now.. asking myself IS it worth it all over again?

Counting down to my HUGE BIG BASH!!

2009-06-21T13:05:00.002+08:00

Isn't she adorable?!

I bought this pink cute little sandals for Little princess but is alittle tight...

"why you looking at me?" haha!

Gonna be a smart little girl

(the 2 photos above is when she is about 5 months +) the rest is about 6 mths.

Let me be Enthia fan for this min! oh my gosh!!!! so long I have not seen her... Guess she don't even know or recognise me...sads=(

but is ok...there will be chances! haha! She look like a boy boy but now she looks more girly when her hair start to grow. that time she cut botak totally like boy.ha!

Anyways I love her!!! hahha!

Special cute little princess that has a special place in my heart.<3

2009-06-21T13:03:00.001+08:00

Woohoo!! I'm totally hooked to this snack!! Thanks Beth for sharing this nice healthy snack with me!

2009-06-21T12:47:00.002+08:00

my Big White specs!!

taken by her. hmm...serious look?

I lOVE HER!! MY DEARIE!! ;)

just another simply chill out time with my dearie. Didn't go club though.ha! later end of the day, we went to Clark Quay starbucks. Had a fun time chatting with her!

2009-06-18T13:45:00.002+08:00

It's a beauty isn't it? I just simply adore sunflowers!

Received a really BIG Sunflower Yesterday! is much more bigger than the usual ones i see!

Really made my day although is just a stalk of sunflower. Just brings so much smiles on my face just by looking at it.

2009-06-18T13:34:00.002+08:00

Carzy day with Nicole as usual!! Talking, Crapping & Talking, Craping!!!!

Now i realise your lips quite sexy ah NICOLE!!! hahaha! laughing my ass out!!!

U look nice with ur birdy!!

Thanks for being there for me and making me Laugh! thanks friend!!

2009-06-16T16:38:00.002+08:00

HAHA!!! i look so nerdy in the picture above!!!! haha my new grooming specs without degree..so so nerdy hahah! but i like the colour!

I really can't stand people talkin half way and just sign off like that! like HELLO!!!! DO YOU KNOW WHAT IS BASIC RESPECT??!! ask u afew questions then u shoot me like shit.

At least I respect you that's why i didn't post your name up. It PISSES me off cox you don't even know how to bloody hell respect me. This is my own personal bloggy. You don't like what i say? then don't bother to read it the next time. feeling so angry now. wth.

Anyways, Nicole is in the shop right now...gonna have an enjoyable day with her later for dinner n chill out time yeah!

2009-06-15T14:45:00.003+08:00

The 2 guys behind is super dam irritating!!! trying to get my attention.

Pissed me off! especiallly the one in white! Always trying to get in the way!

SEE!!! AGAIN!!!

ZAC, ME & MEL

MEL, GLORIA & ME

OK! WE DON'T KNOW WHO THE GUYSSSS THAT IS BEHIND US! EXTRA CALAFARE!

NEW FRIENDS!!

THE LADIES

13 June 09,ZOUK NIGHT OUT!

So fun yet so tired cox that very day, I did 5 full grooming NON STOP!!! super tired when I reach Zouk... met afew of Gloria's friends & they are nice nice people!=) Club again people!

2009-06-11T13:47:00.004+08:00

The video above is custom made by my Dearie...

Thanks alot Charrisa dearie... I feel being appreciated once again... this video suppose to make me smile but in the end i cry...cox too touching to me! I love you too my Dearie!omg i sound so LES but don't care hahah!

Yeah...our friendship last forever... Once again,Thanks for being there and doing this video up for me... really appreciate it lot's..

2009-06-09T16:39:00.005+08:00

The Skinny bastard bestie! hahha!!

6 June, My BEstie Nickerson, Advanced Birthday party.!!! was fun, fun, fun!!! 11 June then is his actual birthday...=)

Heys BEstie, I want the photo I took with you! Glad you had fun that day! & so do we! And and and, your most welcome BEstie!

2009-06-09T16:30:00.004+08:00

This was like so long photos...eh, not so long also maybe last few weeks hahaha!! too lazy to upload that time and the photos are with Ming so upload today since I'm free at work haha! that was the very first time i went to the Eski bar... A place that you wanna freeze yourself for that moment! Is simply just CRAZY hahah!!!

2009-06-04T15:56:00.003+08:00

People, my birthday chalet has already been confirmed!!! when everything is some how settled...I will give you all a msg. Hope everything will go smoothly as this is the very first time i Booked a chalet, plan everything, sending out invitations.. tiring process but is all worth it.. after a few years down the road after my 21st birthday...I wanna look back and say I indeed have an enjoyable 21st birthday...to warmth's my heart...Just to have everything being downloaded into my memory to walk with me the next every years to come..

Went out with afew people on Tuesday and Wednesday. was an enjoyable and tiring day and night. I have fun though..

The words you say...may not impact you alot but it does to me...

Trying to suppress everything into the deep dark corner of my heart...Trying so hard to shut that very door...Using all the energy I have but it seems so hard to close...

My tears will be the last thing I wanna show you.

I will smile.

Combawa! to all my friends thats being there for me.=)

2009-06-04T15:42:00.002+08:00

Name:Kim Hyun Joong (Gim Hyeon Jung)Profession: Actor, singerBirthdate: 1986-Jun-6

Birthplace: Seoul, South Korea

Height: 180cm Weight: 68kg

Blood type: B

Star sign: Gemini

Education: Kyonggi University

Hobbies: Playing the guitar, piano, dancing

Notes: He is the leader and eldest member of the Korean group SS501

Alright!!! Let me be a Mini fan for this very min!hahah! Omg!! i simply adore him alot right now! watching boys over flowers has got me really hooked in the show...How I wish I have a gurdian angel like him(above)

The way he smile... totally totally melts my heart...

2009-05-30T14:12:00.001+08:00

More photos!

2009-05-28T16:38:00.002+08:00

NOT ALL GIRLS GO CLUB ARE THERE TO BE CHICKENS! ALRIGHT! Some go there to enjoy the music, dance and chilling out with friends...So...MIND YOUR FREAKING WORDS DUCK!

WOW! what an insult to us...Dam F**KER! OOPS!

2009-05-28T15:27:00.002+08:00

Met my God- son Garret on the way to work today...Every time i saw him...He grown so much..this time round he is able to run very fast.haha! he is always so shy when he saw me...the shy expression that he gave me really melts my heart so much that makes me wanna look at him more...He is my little Sunshine... that really make my day by seeing him smile...

Left to take a cab to work...but half way through the journey, the taxi driver hit the lorry in front of the cab! literately, i was being some how pushed forward by the impact of sudden braking! that really scare me off cans! my right arm was some how injured...is bandaged now...hope everything will be fine... and that kills my day... now I am feeling so tired and so moody...maybe i didn't have enough sleep..

2009-05-28T15:14:00.002+08:00

Loves my hair...

Back view... I love the back alot !!! haha...wanna cut this short but Don' think Austin allows...haha!

Side view.

Nicole after hair cut photo..

before hair cut photo...

oKays... met Nicole up Yesterday too...supposed to watch night at the museum but but we don't have enough time! She wanted to have a hair cut so we went to find Austin... in the end i also decided to trimmed my hair. ha! feel lighter now... I simply love Nicole's new hair cut! totally!

We didn't do much but we definitely enjoyed each others accompany! meet up again soon k!

Next time round, watch movie! had fun with you girl!

2009-05-28T15:02:00.004+08:00

Ming don't wana take photo so gottcha! here's a bit of him. really abit hah!

Celebrated Shan's 21st birthday Yesterday & had dinner... then we went D'O for a chill out time. was quite fun but the songs...some really not nice at all. We opened one bottle of martell... and yeap i drank quite abit. mixed with coke... not bad not bad. went to dance floor to dance dance. M tired so enjoy the photos yea!

2009-05-26T13:22:00.004+08:00

This is what my dear friend, pork pork says to me through msn...

u are a person whom i feel that u ..
u are eldest in the family .. responsible.. and caring .. might have lots of bad experience but .. u knw wad to do.. u learn as u fall.. and u hope for a better future in yaself
u are more commanding than me i can say.

wow wow wow...thanks pork..hahha!

Yes! tomorrow is my off day that I am so looking forward to! gosh! woohoo!!! Okays..Yesterday spent money on earrings again...-.-

Happy.

2009-05-22T15:09:00.002+08:00

WOOhOO!!! bought this 2 clothes online from Joanne... the leopard skirt is for my loves...she can go crazy for leopard design. hope she will love it. i love the black one! hahah! gonna collect it later or tomorrow night. can't wait! and the price for the 2 of it is only 29 bucks!!

I have already added the link in my Link list...the two above are from love@firstsight and the other webby is Pw dolls.. not bad choice for you to do your online shopping for clothes! so don't wait anymore! go have a look!

2009-05-21T15:00:00.000+08:00

HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY DEARIE,
CHARISSA POH!! LOVE YOU!!!=)

2009-05-21T14:29:00.002+08:00

Yesterday met up jojo to pass her some cookies then after that met up Fei.

Went to shop at far east to find a present for my dearie but but can't find anything suitable for her...sorry dearie..will get something for you asap yea.. went for movie like finally after so long long long but is not the movie that i wanna watch...Angels and Demons...

First part totally can sleep but comes to the middle and end part, start to be interesting..

the show lasted for 2 and a half hours i think... sit until my butt pain haha! I wanna watch night at the museum part 2!!!!!!!!!!

ok back to the topic... after that met my dearest Auntie Pat for dinner...nice nice!

received a msg from my loves saying she wanna go club! Like so last min!(my loves is a nurse) she was transferred to another ward to work so is a good news for her so so so...went to club with her lo... was a pretty fun night! had 4 shots, 3 vodka redbull. dance like a crazy person on stage...and we rejected 12 guys that wanna dance with us! OMG 12 guys!! gosh! broke my record cans! haha! is fun rejecting guys muhahaha! Tried to take pics but it turn out weird! haha! so those on top are selected among the rest...was a fun, tiring, fun day & night.

oh ya...Yesterday night at Double O'...in the ladies toilet...a lady was totally drunk and uses her heels to knock on the door real hard..over and over again & is super noisy...the rest of the ladies in the toilet was like shouting, scolding at her... haha..so drama la!

2009-05-19T13:58:00.002+08:00

Okays...this is what dearie bought the last few days when we were shopping. bought this Victoria secret pouch for $30 (original price is $39.90 i think) haha...She bargained for it and the shop is located at the CENTRAL shopping mall! She is good at bargaining!

Miss my dearie! Meet up soon!!

2009-05-19T13:45:00.002+08:00

Yesterday went to this Hotel at Whampoa with Ming & Kat....eh! don't think side ways ah! go there for Buffet la! Porridge buffet for 9 bucks! gosh! see the amount of plates in the pic above! gosh gosh! haha! Fun fun night and is cheap! Gonna go back some day again! haha!

2009-05-17T18:12:00.003+08:00

Yesterday...had fun with dearie! for the rest... I have nothing to say...

Waiting for 27 May to c0ome! Shan birthday cum LADIES NIGHT!!! woohoo!

2009-05-16T00:53:00.004+08:00

Thursday night met Ming, Heng, Min zai , BESTIE boy friend,Nick to have a chill out time haha! went to old school...near PS. There's a staircase that leads right all the way up to the place...think is some short cut...but that flight of stairs like GREAT WALL OF CHINA that amount of steps! SO tiring cans! haha! then we drank and ate pizza...the pizza is NICE!

Our RANDOM SOLO pics are up above! NICE NICE!!!

oh ya, MING thanks for the sweet macrons! =)

okays, gtg sleep...nights everyone!

2009-05-14T13:15:00.003+08:00

Inessabelle & me..

RIRI & me...

(after pic)

+

+

(before pic)

MY off day, i didn't really do much though. left home about 3 pm to my house market....to try out the new manicure shop! Gosh really is dam good there! highly recommended by me! Get the address from me ya! haha! after that headed down to Lavender to get something from my boss...Yes the ring that I have been waiting for has finally arrived! and I am wearing it now! haha! Everything was quite a rush so after that i went to cityhall to meet the guy in red(above)

YLC students may know him! haha! Jia wei!!! Jia wei!!! had dinner then then head down to expo for prayer meeting.

Called Ming and Kat after the meeting ends...and our final destination was the bak ku tae store near kat's house... had dessert too! muhahaha!!! gosh eaten alot mans! gosh gosh gosh.....

And the Stupid Ming suggested that walked home from whampoa and thats what we did! omg! Totally Bushed when i reached home! M happy that I didn't go club Yesterday night.

2009-05-13T12:45:00.002+08:00

I loved this pic!!! cox i look funny! haha

GOSH GOSH GOSH!!! i love my blog song so so so much!

A very meaningful song!

Title: I wanna grow old with you

By: Westlife

PEEPS! wanna have a look at the lyrics? go yahoo search cox I am lazy to post in my bloggy!

Is worth for you to see the lyrics!

2009-05-12T14:43:00.002+08:00

(Nice background huh?? with all the detergents behind me at the corner..haha!)

oK great, M so bored at work...NO customer at all...but suppliers-.-...

Stupid Travis and delivery man bully me...TSK TSK! but in the end also got shoot by me hahah!

Yeah, tomorrow my off day again! woohoo!don't who to go out with...but going prayer meeting at night i think...Who is free tomorrow for shopping? ha or meet up?

Tonight, m gonna meet my dearie again! talk, chat, talk and chat!

Dearie, don't be late ah! Love you!!! hahah!

-Things settled.

-Feeling so relived now.

-Happier.

2009-05-10T13:21:00.002+08:00

The birthday boy, Juan wei!(in yellow shirt)

Attended Ah jun 21st birthday party! gosh, so many people ... most of the time we were just chit chatting among ourselves as we do not know most of them...so Ming, Kat, Edwin, Mark and I sit talked among ourselves ha! Edwin took my hp to see my photos...he also another one keep saying I change alot...-.-...

-Keep asking me where the Sec sch Von go?... but the chit chatting session was great! besides that we were feeding mosquitoes...

Nothing much to update also haha!

2009-05-10T13:09:00.002+08:00

Hahaha! Finally I bought the dress i saw at mphosis! REALLY LIKE FINALLY! Gosh, really happy! Met Charissa and her friend at CQ Yesterday night for a time to chill out. Was Fun!
Meet up soon girls!

oh ya! After so long long time...also finally met KELVIN! The Shy guy! oh gosh! He is dam fit! i was actually mesmerised by his smile! haha! Captivated by it! ha!
KELVIN! you must be honoured that I compliment you in my bloggy!haha! & he keep saying I changed alot! -.-....

Bestie Nickerson, Please confirm with me earlier which day you wanna go club so I can ask my friends yea! mIss you too bestie boy friend!

2009-05-08T14:46:00.003+08:00

I love her!

Talked to Kelvin(KELKEL) till late yesterday...silly boy always bored....

Funny boy...waiting for you to come online...Hurry up!

Happy Birthday to my Dearest boy friend, JUAN WEI! =D

2009-05-07T14:43:00.003+08:00

WHen two girls come together....how can they miss out taking photos?hahah! ok la not really Cam-Whoring cox not much also haha!

oKayS! shall not update too much due to laziness....

Anyways, my left hand last finger...i broke my nail! IS dam pain now!!!! even if I contact with water...no choice but to bear the pain for at least a week!!!! TOTALLY ARGH!!!

Thanks kat for the everything!

Tomorrow night, going to Jun's birthday party...gonna drink again...Gosh! Promised someone to have self- control..So yup....

Hope tomorrow will be a better and happier day!

Lye on Ur shoulder for that few secs...guess no more special feelings any more...

Cherish the people around you! is the most impt thing right now...Don't miss the chance & regret later...

Charissa, Liz, GXF and many others....your all deeply MISSed by me!!! MEET UP SOON PLEASE!

2009-05-05T14:11:00.002+08:00

Was boring one of the days and i took this pic...& found out that I Look so so so Much like my younger sister!!! it was really like OMG cans! Auntie Pat also saw it...She was shocked too! haha! Can tell which one is me?haha...I am the eldest then followed by my brother then my sister...but I Don't think my bro and I look alike..haha...

but I Think the percentage for the look alike for my sister & me is probs..75 or 80% ...hmmm...

What do you think?

(her zoom in photo will even look like me!but i don't have that pic ha)

YEAH YEAH YEAH!!! tomorrow is the day i am so looking forward to...my off day! woohoo! And gonna enjoy it to the fullest... but one day is not enough ...haha... shall post tmr or the day after...byes

2009-05-03T18:53:00.002+08:00

I hate Swineflu! SERIOUSLY! Guess no one like it... Liz has to be quarantine as she is working as a nurse... I can't see her...that's really sickening! Argh!

ok...I'm still feeling heavy at heart...trying to tell people but I can't...I can be a dustbin(people's listening ear) But I find it real hard to tell people how i feel and whats happening to me... guess nothing is gonna change even if i say everything out.

I am feeling a strain in my head...hope my headache will not be back... I want to have my leave now!!

Yeah! got my LV bag! one thing to be happy about...

2009-05-01T15:44:00.002+08:00

This is her after make up pic! nice right??!! haha! although can't really see haha!

Trying out herself...drawing eye liner..haha

Met Girlfriend up on Wednesday and of cox as usual...Fun fun fun! was teaching her about make up. haha! she looks nice with make up on! haha! or should i say my make up skills improved...hahaa!! okok...i keep looking at her after the whole make up was done haha!!!

Bestie Girlfriend, Meet up soon again!!! we never fails to Laugh when we're out tgt! haha!

Gonna meet my dearie later! haha...

I want my Coach ring & LV bag! hahah!

Bit by bit, im trying to forget.

2009-04-30T16:38:00.002+08:00

Missing you has become part of my life now....
Somehow like a habit that can't be corrected...
Time seems so hard to pass when things were finally made clear...
The tiny whiny hurt was already there...
Tried to cover it with some other things but...useless...

Just like what I said "your not mine to begin with..." I know it that's for real...

So many things.... ME = Unhappy.

Clubbing when your upset...makes things even worst... (Already Tested.)

2009-04-28T13:16:00.003+08:00

Thank God for answering my prayer...It has been a year since you left...Many things have happened within that very year. Circumstances, Situation forces me to be someone I am not... Yesterday Received your msg...I am so so happy. Tears with Joy. Finally, my girl is back... You always have a special place in my heart. Met you up... things have really changed so much between the 2 of us. The feeling of us back then is much more happier than yesterday.

You said I changed alot...Yea indeed. wilder i guess?
I am so happy even seeing you one more time...but on the way home...your msg crashes my heart. Your disappointed with me...the word disappointed really pull me down to the deepest of my heart where i hide all my saddest things.Trying to lock myself in that cold dark room where no one can enter...
You told me all that has happened during the year...
I wanted so much to be there encouraging you as your my dearest friend. but I was never given a chance...

I wanted so much to talk to you when I am in my sad times, you were not there...
Wanting to share with you my happiest times, you were not there...
You are the very first girl, I brought to Christ...being a leader over you...

Yea i have changed for the worst i guess...typing this with tears in my eyes...
Things will never be the same anymore...
I am a failure as a leader...should I step down?
Asked God today..."if she is disappointed with me...God,i guess your even disappointed with me right?"
I had high expectations for myself. I dropped from a high point to the lowest point...
I don't know what to do...
But am Glad your back talking to me...
I am not blaming you or saying you but I am blaming myself...

Realised that so many unhappiness... I have been suppressing it into my heart...didn't vent out at all.. my heart is so painful that i can hardly breathe right now. I will be fine I guess...

You told me you don't wanna lead me on...
Feelings is so real but is for me to leave untouched...
I believed your a good person but you said your not...
So your trying to Push me to another guy?
It hurts my heart even more......
Just hope that you will not regret whatever your decision is... cox can't turn back anymore...

Guess your not mine to begin with...

I am going on a vacation soon...i hope. with Charisssa..hope she can go... either Aussie, HK or Taiwan.

2009-04-26T22:25:00.004+08:00

I LOVE MY BESTIE GIRL FRIEND!!!! Had so much fun, fun &&& FUN with her! She always the happy girl! Went O bar Yesterday night. Well, all I can say is that quite happening la! will not get into details...ask me if you want...cox lazy to type! muhahaha! Drinks after drinks keep coming in as we were sitting on the bar table. The bartender, 23 was super dam cute!Really mans!! Of cox how can i missed out the dance floor?! The ah meng was there again! Sweating smelly MENG! can I like shoot him down?? He is super irritating... Swinging here & there...Climb here & there. Can't even do a proper dance with him around.. groups after groups of guys taking turns to dance with us. Girlfriend was pretty shy and cox she wearing heels..had difficulties dancing haha! see la, Liz! wear heels la! hahaha! took numbers from the guys and Indeed was a pretty happening Fun night! I had fun!

OK I am tired le....bye...thats all for now! haha

I love my girlfriend!

2009-04-25T13:23:00.002+08:00

HAHAHA!!! maybe i can get a new job of being a R/S consultant! Yesterday talked to a guy friend...feeling confused. His msn nick before talking to him was "Should I or Should I not?" after i talked to him it changed to " I've been enlighten. stay clear and focused." WA, WA, WA!!! i Didn't know what i say impacted you so much MR! haha! then met Charissa aftermath. Talked to her abt R/S thingy again! Really la if maybe there is a job abt r/s consultant maybe maybe i will go for it as a part timer! hahaha! LAME! Sometimes I guess is easier for an outsider(which is me) to oversee everything...That's why i can't save myself from being in a deep shit when I'm in a confused state...haha.. haha! Tonight is the day that gonna dance dance shake shake! with my Primary school bestie!! update more tmr! byes!

2009-04-24T13:33:00.002+08:00

"Never had I imagined
Living without your smile
Feeling and knowing you hear me
It keeps me alive
Alive

And I know you're shining down on me from Heaven
Like so many friends we've lost along the way
And I know eventually we'll be together
One sweet day"

The 2 parts of the lyrics above from my bloggy song...I find it meaningful...it relates to alot of things and people in my life. OK...this song is EMO! but but with alot of meanings.
Reflected alot of things as I am listening to this song over and over again. Yea indeed, I came a long way as some of you know... all the way back from secondary school...If everything ends during my secondary school times...I will not be even typing here in my blog. In health area, I went through quite a far bit. but is not easy battling alone. The loneliness, the pain...is so unbearable at times...I wanted to vent out everything but it seems that is stuck inside my heart. I don't want my parents to be upset over me...so i chose to Suffer in silence? maybe... i look like a strong lady but inside I am not.Seriously not. Sometimes, i chose to run away from the problem rather than facing it. Cox the consequences is dire...

Sometimes i think...am i a failure being in my family? am i a failure as with my friends? am i a failure being a leader? am i a failure in my life? so so so many questions just pop out into my mind. which i tried to answer but can't even dig out a tiny whiny answer from myself... inside...

feeling so emotional that feelings just keep coming out and trying to hold back as much as i can... Hanging on the cliff, trying to climb up but seems like I am going to fall anytime. Help? Who's there to help except God? I'm just childish at times.. Tried to be independent, trying to walk on my own without anybodies help but all the more I feel I am weaker this way...Ain't I? ha....

I am feeling fine just that thoughts just keep flowing through my mind. so i decided to just blog it down... I'm just a emotional person i guess trying to fight through storms alone...is not easy at all...

2009-04-24T00:27:00.001+08:00

Maybe I should just forget the whole thing. Stop getting confused. No use i guess. Being silly me. Trying & trying....

Forget it........

Got this from Charissa's bloggy....
i want to jus thanks thanks thanks and love love love to my dear vonvon thanks for bringing joy and laughter to me ...meeting me and hearing me...though at times im jus repeating myself o'ver and o'ver and o'ver again..want to let u knoe u are close to my heart (:

That's really sweet of her! Thanks Girl!

After a sleep everything will be better?

2009-04-23T16:23:00.003+08:00

I miss...I miss...I miss...

I miss...your Shoulder

I miss...

I miss...your Smiles

I miss...

I miss...your laughter

I miss...

I miss...your Jokes

I miss...

I miss...your Hugs

I miss you so much. You entered into my life and my heart unknowingly including myself...Guess I do not know until recently......Confused right now....whats my next step? I do not know...

2009-04-23T15:11:00.001+08:00

Before...

After...

Gosh... now my precious Enthia is BOTAK! but she still looks cute. Love her so much!

2009-04-23T14:20:00.004+08:00

This is HIGHLY recmmended by me! Will be found at Tampm 1, basement the jap snacks shop! you will not regret getting it!

I had so much fun Yesterday going out with Nicole!

It all started with me meeting Fei. then we took train all the way to CCK. He is so so funny! Journey was about 45 mins. & it seems the journey is so short cox he is always making me laugh! Time passes super fast when I spend time with him haha!!He took a bus back to camp then i met coco at CCK mrt station. From there we went all the way to Tam 1. Super far Can! is like one end to the other! haha... Reached Tam 1...Heyhey!is time to start SHOPPING!!! not a bad place to shop.. Chat, Laugh, Laugh & chat is what we do the whole day! FUN is the word to say it all. After that we went swensens to have our dinner and we are super full!

I messaged Fei...

Our convo..

Me: Eh! I am eating Swensen's now!...trying to Gek you!

Him:Argh, you dam mean man...But never mind la...I am watching DVD now..

Me: You want the leftovers?Haha! Eh can watch DVD?

Him:haha...My shift haven't start yet man...

Me:No wonder...Chey!

Ok the whole point is that i wanna disturb him! hahaha!

The we headed down to CQ! to chill out at a pub... & there's a Live DJ show there! so cool lahs!

Enjoyed myself the whole day yesterday! Thanks Nicole for accompanying me, making me laugh, Shop with me...your indeed a great gift that God has given me. Thanks!

Oh ya! wanna say THANK YOU to my dearie Charissa! thanks for being there for me too! it always never fails you to make me smile again after talking to you... Really appreciate you lot's!

2009-04-21T17:58:00.002+08:00

Okays!! finally after so many weeks of wanting to order Mac Delivery....I finally ordered today! The previous times I didn't get to order is because of the rainy weather so yups! today is the day! haha! haiss...not meeting Xiao poh tonight cox due to her work...so last minute...stupid boss keep asking her to stay for OT...*PUI,pui,PUI* hahaha!oops! haha guess she also quite pissed....lol! YEah! my Food has arrived!! I think i will be going home early tonight...wa, this few days i have been home super early!! ok byebye!

2009-04-20T23:05:00.002+08:00

Isn't she adorable? Enthia is wearing the dress I gave her!haha! Love Love her!

Today, Monday...I started off cleaning the showcases and hamsters tanks immediately i opened the shop! Started around 12.30pm till end time is 3.30pm i think. Didn't feel the tiredness until I really sat down on the chair to rest.haha! old le la! haha! Gonna meet Xiao poh tomorrow for a chill out time after work... Guess she wanna share her secrets to me..haha! We'll be like crazy girls laughing to ourselves real loud! That's the part i enjoyed!! wahaha!!! She injured her back recently...take care ah girl! I will heart ache you know?haha!(i typed this cause i know you will read my bloggy hahaha!) Shall update more tomorrow.

Congrats that your finally taking out your braces!=)

My poor Fei is stuck in camp....doing duty...(-.-''') *pat Fei*

Anyways...I am meeting my Primary School bestie this Saturday!!! It has been a long time i saw her! miss her lot's!

My off day is coming again!! can't wait to just NUA on my bed in the morning! hahaha!

2009-04-18T23:35:00.002+08:00

I Am so gonna do my nails for my birthday or hmm...maybe next month?hahah! Gonna do some extensions for my nails...Wonder how will it be like? The nails in the pics above...manicure cost about $100 plus...OMG! -.-lll if I do showcase cleaning...i think my nails will be dead. Hahaha...anyway Don't Care! I am gonna do! hahaha!

I am still feeling very frustrated...by my dad. Complain this and complain that to my mum. I was like WTF! I can't even have peace when I reached home. I don't feel the sense of home in my home.. Yea right home sweet home... what crap. How I wish my family have a deeper bonding with each other..argh...forget it...

I seriously need to vent out everything!!! ASAP!!!!!!!!

2009-04-18T12:44:00.002+08:00

You wanna know what you lied?? Fine I will tell you.
You said that He is controlling you during the r/s period & I believed in you like one dumb ass hole but what you said to me yesterday is totally the OPPOSITE!!. The truth is you are the one controlling him. This very one lie maybe small but it kills the friendship. Anyway is already over. Never mind forget it. This morning when i woke up i had a stupid quarrel with my dad. So ridiculous! I was told another news that My old neighbour that brought me up has passed away from a fall yesterday night. WHY so many things have been happening in my life? In like just one night? HAIS... Give me some ideas to vent it all out... Put your ideas in my tag board.

2009-04-18T00:50:00.004+08:00

The 2 photos above are being edited by my dearest girl..Charissa! So nice!! Love it! Thanks girl!!!

Verdict is set. Test is already over. Just hope that everything goes well with you...I give you my best regards...continue to strive for your fashion dream & I never regret having you as a friend. Since you betrayed my trust...the feeling towards you as a normal friend will never be the same again. I can sensed that you really did your best to be who you really are in front of me. But reality is cruel. Once broken the trust for the first time...is hard to recuperate back but for the 2ND time it happens...It may takes ages to heal. I am not angry but disappointed. I will not block you in my msn. I see no point in doing that. I don't want to outcast you... out of my friends circle cox I know what it really feels to be really lonely. Whenever you lied to me...have you considered my feelings? Yea, is not my problem but yours then what for even wanting to tell me at the very first place? I am totally Strength-less now. No point typing so much in my blog.

You all can call me dumb but it doesn't matter to me anymore....It makes me feel so hard to catch my breath. Everything is NUMB now...Heart is sinking real deep. trying to smile but I seriously can't. I know your not feeling any better than me either.

Ok enough of it...

I did a quiz in facebook and this is what I've got...

What am I born to do quiz and the result is Hero.
now we are not talking bout becoming a super hero... but you were born to help others and put others infront of your needs. you are caring and that is your biggest strength you will do really well in those field where you have to help others like social worker or doctor...options are many..

HA...nothing to say about this i guess... MAybe, maybe is true...i don't know..

But being too caring to others will lead to destruction upon myself. -by me

2009-04-17T15:29:00.000+08:00

Trying so hard to hang in there...

My heart feels so burdened...

My very next step defines me to either lose a friend or gain it.

Just want things to be simple but it never did

Feelings are all being suppressed inside my heart.

Additional stress..Guess that's my life.

Hopefully I can manage my emotions..

2009-04-16T18:05:00.003+08:00

OKAYS people! I went to Butter factory at one Fullerton Yesterday ladies night... Not bad Not bad...There's Retro side and R&B side. I prefer the R&B one! It was like JAM packed! whereas the Retro side has lesser people but songs are nice!. Saw Jade Seah too.

Wa the drinks shiok mans!! FREE! haha! NICE NICE NICE!

But but I still prefer Double O!

Double O ladies has better fashion sense than butter fac.

Double O guys are more despo than butter fac guys.

hahaha! Actually nothing more to blog haaha so peace out people!

2009-04-14T00:41:00.003+08:00

Finally the day I have been waiting for is here! Collection for my own custom made cap! LOVE IT LOVE IT LOVE IT LOT'S!!! Flav went down with me to collect my cap. & the guy in charge remembered me! haha! All the retards pics are on top! continue having fun with my cappy again! byes!

2009-04-13T00:17:00.003+08:00

Is hard being a nice person...
so hard that no matter how nice I am...I guess people take me for granted...
Call me a KW person...-Fine,
Call me a selfish person...-Fine,
Say that I don't care about my friends problems...-Fine
Say that I am childish at times...-Fine
Say that I am serious and can't take jokes...-Fine
Say that i broke my verbal promise...- Fine
Say that I am not steady...-Fine
Say that I PS my friends...-Fine
Say that I only care about myself and not other people...-Fine

FINE, FINE & FINE! I DON'T GIVE A DAM TO ANY OF YOU RIGHT NOW AT THIS MOMENT! WHAT FOR I PUT IN SO MUCH BUT I GET SHIT BACK?! TALK ALL YOU WANT! JUST REMEMBER THERE'S A LIMIT TO WHAT I CAN TAKE...
That's why I say "TALK IS CHEAP IN THIS GENERATION..WHICH HURTS PEOPLE UNKNOWINGLY. "

This is my personal blog.so I can type whatever i want here. if you don't like JUST SHOO OFF! will be better for you i guess!

can don't talk to me.I am alright with it.

Sometimes i guess... maybe I am not yet a qualified 24/7 dustbin for people to throw out their unhappiness.. hahaha...
Am i doing a bad job? I don't know...DAM DAM DAM! F****!=

Smile and everything will be fine?

2009-04-12T13:50:00.004+08:00

MY VERY OWN NAME CARDS!!SO HAPPY!!!

Met Vashon, Flavian & Joseph after work then went to club! ahaha!! Actually wanted to go butter factory but in the end cox shon heard from her friend that PLAY is fun so we went there instead of butter fac. CHecked IC then Joseph can't go in cox they don't accept ITE card...so he went home.OKAYS! Everything seems normal when we went in but as the crowd comes in...The REAL show begins...

Hit the dance floor but no one dare to go up to the stage...In the end, I am the one went up the stage first with Flavian & everyone cheered for us! Then less than 2 mins, more people came up to the stage...yup there's girls but not many...all are Gays,Gays & gays...OmG! that is like super disgusting La! I am so NOT going back there again! oh gosh!There's this fatty Indian guy wearing a scarf tried to steal my limelight and he pushed me aside using his super big butt! DAM STUPID GAY! Fine, Forget it since the "high" feeling for dancing is not there... so no use fighting with him over the lime light. Went in for an hour then left to O bar...reached there, the receptionist said that need to be at least 20 year old and above then can go in...Vashon can't go in so no choice went to butter factory...entry fees are so expensive! but looks quite fun...maybe try out some time but in the end we still didn't go in.

Shon was tired...she went home. Flavian said that he wanted to go back to PLAY so he went then me? haha! met FEI! at Lido. Met him that time was around 230am then we went 7-11 to get some drinks. & due to his funniness, he got himself extra 2 bottle caps opener. Maybe the cashier attracted to him??! & the cashier is an Indian guy! hahah! kidding la... then walked to wheelock place that side to chat..With him around, I will never gets bored. he is so funny!
We talked alot of crap, crap & CRAPS! HE introduced me HOUSE songs n Other R&B songs. I still prefer R&B...haha

Enjoyed the time being with him.. then is about 5 am that we left to get a cab. He sent me home and when the taxi reached my place...the first thing he said was " Wa! where is this ULU PANDAN place?" I was like LOL la!

Anyway Singapore won't get lost! haaha! Then brought him to the bus stop & that time was like 530am. First bus is 6am...so he send me back to my block lift again from the bus stop...since like he has another half an hour to wait hahaha! When I am about to leave,He hugged me dam tight that I think I am being squeeze.. hahaha..then washed up, finally sleep! woke up at 10am to prepare for work. And now here I am blogging and stoning at the same time. Hopefully what i typed makes sense hahaa!!!

Guess He is still sleeping now.Time now is 4.45pm..Sleepy head,is time to wake up to pee pee!haha!

Bestie!! Don't worry... I am here for you! that's what friends are for! you know what I am refering to!

2009-04-08T00:30:00.002+08:00

Met Beth for dinner yesterday night at the Singapore flyer..She is funny! & the both of us was like coughing coughing throughout the night...but is an enjoyable night talking to her and joking

Can tell from the photos that we are actually having alot of fun right!!Some reatrds photos...haha! BETH MEET UP AGAIN SOME TIME YA!

2009-04-04T22:54:00.002+08:00

I am at city hall Starbucks posting this post right now... haha
I think I am falling in love with Starbucks cafe...Flavian just left not long...And I am alone now!! Hais...someone put plane on me...what to do? so emo alone lo..haha! I am gonna walk all the way to CQ again this time round!! enjoy the night life...I seriuosly didn't go clubbing today... I keep complaining to Flavian about my stupid cough that causes my night of clubbing! He was like...LOL?? He said this"Make sure you fully recovered then You start your clubbing life again" I was like ok! not long...next Saturday lo! haha! HE give me this face(-.-lll) ...haha!! I really can't wait till next Saturday...Argh! Cough,Please go away!!!

Saw one msn nick...says: many are backsliding...wonder if cell gp can stay on?..

I was like WTH immediately la!
-If I can be at the cell meeting i will be there!
-If I can go for G12, I will be there!
-If cell needs my support, I will still be there for them!

Yes! I am not there for cell now due to work but my heart really long for the time being together all over again...hais

Hais...actually I am afraid that cell gp may just end..... Missed the Spiritual family that I am in...
Everything is so different now...feeling is so different not like before... Every one busy with their own stuff... Just hope that this cell gp will be firmly rooted and linked together hand in hand.

Alrighty,Go to go! Peace out!!

PS:(Bestie!! next Saturday ok???wahaha!)

2009-04-03T00:33:00.003+08:00

Yesterday took the medication from my doctor...but in the end IT GOT WORST!!!
Hais...Cough, cough go away and come again another day...aaaa! No no no...Don't come any more!haha!

Just now I had some time to chill out alone..walking from Cityhall all the way to C.Q to take train... Thinking through lot's of things...Bits & pieces of everything..trying to learn to understand things from the other angle.. Seeing the night life of Singapore... Seems like time has really paused for that very moment...felt so relived & relaxed...

But I still missed dancing though! this week not gonna go...cox due to my stupid cough...so have enough rest first then conserve my energy for next week! haha!!

2009-04-01T23:32:00.011+08:00

Met Charissa yesterday for a girls talk...then after talking went to the Bugis hotel that toilet....This crazy girl wants to take photos so OK take with her...i thought is only a few pics but but....is more then 40 pics she took! The photos above are just part of it only Can! and I am still having a terrible cough and looking dam pale...Alot of her SOLO pics la...The both of us was like talking very loud in the toilet cox only the 2 of us so make use of the whole toilet

1 April, Happy April fools day! Vashon called me this afternoon and told me that Flavian got injured and was sent to Hospital...the problem is I met Flavian just the day before April.& he is perfectly fine! I was dam shocked la..quickly asked her where is the hospital and how is he...

Then Vashon answer was 'HAPPY APRIL FOOL'S DAY!!!' I was like WTH!!!! KNS!!! KENA TRICKED by her!!!!

Vashon, last year didn't get to tricked me so this year is a MUST DO THING LA is it??? I am so gonna knock your head until got "baluku" when the next time I see you! hahah!

2009-04-01T12:58:00.002+08:00

JULY Birthdays:
Fun to be with. Secretive.
Difficult to fathom and to be understood. Quiet unless excited or tensed.
Takes pride in oneself. Has reputation.
Easily consoled. Honest. Concerned about peoples feelings.
Tactful. Friendly. Approachable.
Emotional temperamental and unpredictable.
Moody and easily hurt. Witty and sparkly. Not revengeful.
Forgiving but never forgets.
Dislikes nonsensical and unnecessary things.
Guides others physically and mentally.
Sensitive and forms impressions carefully.
Caring and loving. Treats others equally.
Strong sense of sympathy. Wary and sharp.
Judges people through observations. Hardworking.
No difficulties in studying. Loves to be alone.
Always broods about the past and the old friends.
Likes to be quiet. Homely person. Waits for friends. Never looks for friends.
Not aggressive unless provoked.
Prone to having stomach and dieting problems.
Loves to be loved. Easily hurt but takes long to recover.

So people...what do you think? Am I like that?

2009-03-31T16:46:00.003+08:00

ARGH!!!!!!!!!!! MY THROAT HURTS! HOW TO STOP COUGHING??? ERM... WHERE'S MY ANTIDOTE??heez....

Is there any way that I can take out my throat and wash it for awhile so that it will not be that painful?hahah I know its kinda stupid haha!

2009-03-31T15:24:00.005+08:00

What would you do if for every moment you were truly happy, there would be 10 moments of sadness?

I am pondering about this question...I have no answer for that now. ha?

I am trying to answer the questions below too that I hardly have answer for...

Yvonne,Yvonne ,Yvonne...

Are you falling in love all over again?

Do you know what really love is?

Are you sure your ready for it?

Or is it just a fling?

What do you really want? Do you know?

Are you able to continue to stand firmly and strong?

Is your mind in a terrible swirl?

Your afraid..really afraid isn't it?

Lonely?

Yeah...Afraid that my love was not being appreciated back once again. Really afraid that once i fall in love...I will fall into a deep pit that I can't even save myself. Actually Its Not That I am Heartbroken , It's Just That My Heart Is Exhausted.
tired that's all...

爱一个人就是牺牲一切，为了他的幸福。爱一个人也是必须尊重他爱的人，忍下悲伤的痛。如果有一天，我不再为你牺牲，也不再为你忍下悲痛，就代表我选择了放弃。

Thanks for me there for me BEST FRIEND...I want and will be right back on track!no matter how exhausted my heart is...I hope A new R/S is coming my way...hope I will have the confidence all over again...

2009-03-31T13:45:00.004+08:00

HAPPY 21st BIRTHDAY GUO WEI!!

OHS!...haha

GAY?!

GUYS!!

I love him! my Long long friend!

SMile!

HAPPY 21st BIRTHDAY MARK PANG GUO WEI!! MY LONG LONG FRIEND EVER SINCE PRIMARY SCHOOL!!

OKays, we had a mini celebration for wei...Shall cut short the story...went to have a chat at starbucks then I quickly thought of a game to "sabo" wei...haha! If not too easy let him off for his 21st birthday hahaha! I quickly grab some starbucks tissue papers and i wrote this...

1) Dance in the middle of the public.

2)Shake an indian guy hand and ask him to wished you a Happy birthday.

3)Say Hello to at least 3 people.

4)Pole dance.

5)Do a 10 pose shots.

I folded them into small pieces then i mixed them up...he took his pick! The first one he took is "Dance in the public" He was like "WA!!! SWAY AH!!! I AM NOT DANCING!!"
hahaha!!! Ming told him that if you don't want to dance then swallow the tissue paper la! then no evidence le haha! GUESS WHAT! he really swallowed it...ALL of us was like LOL!!! He even describe the taste to us and it taste yucky!haha!

Then he took the one he shake hands with indian guy followed by the rest. All i can say is that Wei is a shy guy! He is so shy to do the Pole dance haha! But it was really really fun! What a night! Once again Happy Birthday Guo wei! (for more info about wei's birthday go to Kat's blog for more details hahaha)

Yesterday went to my check up..same thingy again/same process...Took 2 tubes of blood...then went to see my doctor. ok, when my doctor asked me to weigh myself I was scared. Every girl doesn't want to see their weight if is not decrease...but no choice in the end i still weighed myself. with my eyes closed, fingers crossed. My doctor say my weight decreased by 4 kg!!

Oh my gosh! I am so so so so so so so so HAPPY!!! I told Kat that i have set a deadline for myself that i will hit the weight that i wanted before my birthday. & I hope I can do it haha! I am still having terrible cough cans! haiss...!

Then went to novena to shop shop!bought 2 in 1 dress cum skirt. for only $19 only.

Met Samantha in the evening for a long chat.

2009-03-29T13:00:00.002+08:00

OK Pictures are quite dark... but yesterday night was a fun fun fun one! Oh ya! I forgot to take photo with XiangFei!OOPS!! haha! Songs are like so retro n some R & B...I still prefer R&B!haha! Wondering why Nickerson keep "Sayang" my head yesterday...hmmm...why ah Nick?but Thanks for being there for me BEST FRIEND!

I think theres a part I really SEHA...gone le...haha! talking nonsense again. wth??!! haha!Went to dance then I am fine but continue drinking..gonna make myself a hard core drinker haha! hope la! (People I know you all are gonna kill me for this sentence...)

Then Nick Left, around 2+am...Left me and FEI and we went back to the dance floor! haha! DANCE, DANCE & DANCE!!! Thanks for the hug, holding on to my hand(never let go for the whole night-if I'm not wrong haha) and being there for me man!Love you!Really appreciate you!

I saw this lady on the top stage dancing then don't know what am I thinking mans! I went up to dance!!! GOSH!... some sort like I want to 'compete' with her..GOSH,Gosh! but guess what? I WON!! Stage is mine for the rest of the remaining night!! Awhile later, go off le... cox is already 4am! then went out of the bar to chat awhile and be sober first before going home. so reach home around 5am.then SLEEP!

Woke up at 9am today..Seriously lack of sleep! & m coughing badly.

PS: Good girl turn bad?

I LOVE U ALL!!!

2009-03-28T12:55:00.002+08:00

TITLE: Singalong Song

I wrote this song
it's not too long
cos' I've been thinking 'bout you
I wrote this song
maybe I'm wrong
To be caught up about you

Well I dont know
what you think 'bout me
Maybe you think nothing at all
But maybe you could just lie to me
And we could be in love you see

Oh it's a singalong song
that's not too long
It's when I think about you
that I hear songs
And you can singalong
maybe if you want to
Cos' baby I wrote this
I wrote this for you

I wrote this song
it's not too long
Cos' I'm the one
who loves you
I wrote this song
this can't be wrong
I don't wanna smile without you

Well I just want to make you happy
but maybe you want nothing at all
and how I wish that you're meant to be
forever and a day with me

Oh it's a singalong song
that's not too long
It's when I think about you
that I hear songs
And you can singalong
maybe if you want to
Cos' baby I wrote this
I wrote this for you

In everyway you mean more to me
than you'll ever know
girl I'll do my best to show these words are true
and if you'd like to make a song
and be a perfect harmony with me
I'd find the greatest words sing
so we could write our own romance

Oh it's a singalong song
that's not too long
It's when I think about you
that I hear songs
And you can singalong
maybe if you want to
Cos' baby I wrote this
I wrote this for you
Oh it's a singalong song that's not too long
It's when I think about you that I hear songs
And you can singalong maybe if you want to
Cos' baby I wrote this I wrote this for you

Cos' baby I wrote this I wrote this for you

2009-03-26T17:46:00.002+08:00

AH HEH came to find me today!!! And she spent her time with me in the shop...at least time passed faster as i did my cleaning. Super long didn't see her...i think is around 2 weeks +...that is super long can! She make my heartbeat go faster!!! OMG I SOUND SO LES!! SIAO! she is my BBF!!! Thanks once again for accompanying me today! & thanks for the chocolate!